No one had greater character than Jesus Christ. His perfect character was not developed in easy times. He became a leader because of the problems he had to endure. Hebrews 2:10. God allows us to go through adversities, trials, and tribulations so that we develop that same strength and character. Character cannot be developed without pain.

“After you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who imparts all blessing and favor, who has called you, will complete and make you what you ought to be.” 1 Peter 5:10.

This letter was sent to me this past week and it has confirmed what we’ve been dealing with outside the Hope Clinic. In all of my fourteen years of being on that sidewalk daily, I have never experienced the reproach that has been showing up for the past few months.

These professing Christians will not come under authority, they will not listen to the established leaders, and they will not take correction.

Many, many babies have been unfortunately killed by those who profess to love Jesus. Their insults and screams have made these mothers more determined to get inside away from all the noise. It has turned more unsaved souls away from Jesus than these egomaniacs would care to know.

We don’t have to worry about the Hope abortion Clinic destroying babies or this vital ministry; the holy hypocrites are doing a pretty good job.

Dear Angela:

After visiting the Hope Clinic with a friend on Saturday, May 12, I got curious about your organization and ministry so I looked you up on the internet. Actually, I was looking to see if a photo of me or my car would appear on your site after noticing several pro-lifers walking around with digital cameras and video recorders. I would like to call your attention to the following entry from the "street report" segment of your website:

After being degraded and screamed at by the troublemakers, a man and his wife who had gotten the abortion, got into their car and were leaving when Rick gave the man literature and a Bible. The man shook Rick’s hand and told him, “God bless you! Things may of turned out differently had they not screamed her in there.” “A kind word turns away wrath.” Proverbs 15:1.

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I am the man who shook Rick's hand and said "God Bless You" to him as he offered me literature that day, and I wanted to share some insights and observations about my visit to Hope Clinic with you because after reading your website, and learning what you and your ministry do; I would like to say that I whole heartedly agree with your work, and I am impressed by the fact that you are actually reaching out to the women who enter Hope Clinic in an effort to help them and offer them a better choice; rather than spewing hatred and condemnation like some of the other pro-life activists I witnessed that morning. (namely the black guy wearing a collar, and a couple of others with him)

So for what it's worth, I'd like to share with you my experience of that day. Firstly, I would like to clear something up:

Although you referred to me and my friend as "man and his wife" in your entry; this is not the case. In fact, she is not even my girlfriend... Nor was I the father of her aborted child. That said, I will tell you why I was at the clinic that day. The woman I went to Hope Clinic with is a long time friend of mine who turned to me for help when she learned that she had to have an escort for her appointment at Hope. She had no one else she could trust with the fact that she was going to have an abortion, and no one else was available to make the 3 hour drive to Granite City that day. When she told me she was pregnant, and approached me about escorting her, I was hesitant. I asked her why wasn't the father (her ex boyfriend) going to handle that duty. She informed me that they were no longer on speaking terms and that he wanted to nothing to do with having the baby, nor did he want to pay for an abortion, yet alone be the one to take her to it. Basically, she was on her own. She has few close friends, and getting assistance from her family was out of the question. She is 40 years old, has two children from a previous marriage, and she's not in the best of emotional health. Her and her family are devout Catholics as well. She told me I was one of only two people she could turn to for this, and the other one had no drivers license; so she wasn't an option. So she turned to me and I agreed to make the trip to Granite City with her.

Prior to this event, I hadn't really given the issue of abortion much thought. This is the first time I've had any direct experience with it. I've known women who have had them, but never someone this close to me. Despite being a Christian, and politically very conservative; I never really have taken any kind of "firm stand" on the issue. I've always been kind of floating in the middle between "pro-life" and "pro-choice". I guess that being a man and knowing that I would never be pregnant made it easy to be ambivalent about it. However, I have never been comfortable with it and have always seen it as something less than clean....yet something that had never affected me personally until my visit to Hope Clinic a week ago. Since that day, and after reading your website (and numerous others); I have given the topic of abortion a lot of thought, and I can definitely say I now believe that abortion is dirty and evil....and most importantly, I believe that abortion is certainly not part of God's plan which he has for people.

Yes, I asked her if she was sure she wanted to abort when she told me of the pregnancy. She told me her reasons she wanted to abort, and also told me she had prayed very much about it. Maybe I should have tried to convince her to keep the baby, but it was quite obvious that nothing I was going to say was going to change her mind. She had made up her mind, and she was very adamant about it. She's pretty "hard boiled" and stubborn, so I knew there was no way she would change her mind. Despite not being wholly comfortable about assisting her with her dilemma; I agreed to go to Granite City with her because we are friends and she has been there for me in the past when I needed some support or a favor.

Anyway, we were the first car to arrive at the Clinic that morning. We made the mistake of parking right next to the alley and were immediately verbally accosted by the black man wearing what appeared to be the collar of a priest; and a couple others. These people were openly hostile and judgmental. As we tried our best to ignore them, we watched them as they harassed clinic employees as they reported for work. In my opinion, this is not a very good approach towards trying to dissuade women from abortion - hence my comment about "things might have turned out differently" without being screamed at and condemned. Unfortunately, when I made the comment I wasn't referring to my friend. As I mentioned above, nothing was going to change her mind. I was referring to other women (or couples) who come to Hope Clinic. I can't quote the specific scriptures, but after experiencing the tirades of a few of those people that morning, the "...don't judge, lest ye be judged", thing comes to mind. Also coming to mind was the ability of some people to spot twigs in other people's eyes, despite having a log in theirs! That's one of the reasons that motivated me to write to you. After visiting your website, reading about your work, and reading about your success stories and your "saves"...it is obvious that you are attempting to minister and help people...not just empty proselytizing.

I have no idea what goes through a woman's mind when she is considering an abortion. I do know of a friend who once told me that her abortion was the biggest regret of her life, so I do know that it is an extremely emotionally and traumatic experience. I also know that women probably carry a lot of psychological scars with them after having an abortion. The pain on a lot of people's faces inside that waiting room at the clinic was apparent, I will tell you that. I saw people from all walks of life in there. I'm glad I wasn't there as a mother, or as a father...and I feel guilty enough now about just being there in the first place, even though I was just helping out a friend.

I have been thankful in the past that I have never been in a situation where I had impregnated a woman and would be faced with having to be a part of that kind of decision. Like I said before, I have always been kind of ambivalent about it. After this experience, I can definitely be counted among the ranks of the pro-life.

Should abortion be illegal? It's easy to say "yes". However, there will always be women willing to have them, and doctors willing to perform them; regardless of it being illegal. This is sad, but true. I don't see how anyone who actually researches the issue of abortion and knows its true effects could do anything other than condemn its practice.

Sorry this is so long. I just wanted to share my experience and let you know that your organization has made me re-think the way I view abortion. Although I couldn't have changed my friends mind, I do feel kind of ashamed that I was a participant in her abortion - even though all I did was basically give her a ride. I am a Christian. I believe in Christ, and I believe in God. I'm far from a "model" Christian and could be a better practicing one. I have prayed for my friend who had the abortion, and I've also prayed that I am forgiven for the role I played. I believe that I am forgiven, but it still feels wrong to me to profess myself as a Christian, yet at the same time enter an abortion clinic. In hindsight, I shouldn't have been at the Hope Clinic...simple as that.

In closing, I would like to ask you to pray for my friend who had the abortion, and throw in a prayer for me, her friend who escorted her. Your ministry, and your methods, do touch people. If not for the subtle and sincere way your friend Rick approached my car when I was leaving the lot that morning. I would have probably left thinking that all people who are pro-life are bitter and hateful zealots based on the actions of others that morning.

Thanks and God Bless,

"J"